The book, originally conceived as “Twilight” fan fiction by author E.L. James, is about the relationship between billionaire Christian Grey and college student Anastasia Steele. The novel is known for its fairly explicit sex scenes, and it’s these bits that have piqued the interest of so many female readers.
Hilarity ensues. Ellen’s “audiobook” involves sound effects she creates using a whip, chains, handcuffs … and a Paddle Ball game, as well as her promised attempts at “paraphrasing”:
“He guides his hands across my … secret garden.”
“Suddenly he took out his … ball-peen hammer?”
“Panties.” (Embarrassed grin.)
and a little commentary:
“Well, I don’t think you should use a spatula for that.”
Ellen also leaves her audience with some important words to live by: “If you go to Anastasia’s house, don’t eat the pancakes.”